Words that I never thought I would say...

"Sam, what did you just wipe on the couch?"

"A booger."

"We do not wipe boogers on furniture."

For all you people out there without boys, this is what you have to look forward to.

(And yes, I know I ended a sentence with a preposition, but let's face it...saying "for what you have to look forward" sounds really hoity-toity.)